Trek Limericks

TOS

Captain James Kirk, he’s brave and bold,
Flying through deep space so cold,
Mind that planet, Jim,
Blue-eyed Bones can’t swim,
And neither can the guy in the Vulcan mold.

TNG

Bald but not bold, Picard’s on the loose,
Chasing a interesting interstellar moose,
For young Locutus,
Who’s not the hirsutest,
It could be hanging or the noose.

Firstly De Troi, pretty Betazoid,
And then her colleague in sickbay’s void:
Beverly Crusher,
Dancer and blusher,
Whose hypospray’s hard to avoid.

DS9

Ben Sisko first, then Major Kira,
Jadzia Dax, with Bashier near her,
Worf, trusty Klingon,
As the wormhole shone,
He took a dive through it- oh, good sir!

Voyager

Captain Kathryn Janeway’s on the bridge,
Call B’Elanna with the forehead ridge,
Lock Kes in sickbay,
Wrap Tuvok in hay,
And then shove Nelix in the fridge!

Enterprise

Archer, first captain of Enterprise,
Is angling for a pay rise,
He asks trip Tucker,
Then T’Pol- sucker!
And when he doesn’t get it, he cries.

Stories